The Jaffe Briefing – June 15, 2018
JERSEY CITY – Should topless women be allowed in the city? That’s the big issue consuming the City Council these days, as members continue to debate 1980s-era obscenity laws. There was supposed to be a vote at the council meeting on Wednesday, but it didn’t happen. Before there is a vote, it appears the goal is to wrangle support of all nine members of the City Council. The nagging question: How do you enforce a topless ban while also respecting the rights of the growing transgender community? Don’t look here for an intelligent answer. But you can learn much, much more at GoTopless.org.
ROSELAND – New Jersey’s centuries of political corruption is hallowed ground, with stories told and retold with relish. But the latest story doesn’t really stack up, with a Roseland councilman appearing in Essex County Superior Court yesterday to plead “not guilty.” The charge? Demanding free snow removal for his property in exchange for a “yes” vote on a redevelopment designation for a neighboring property. Yawn. Roseland Councilman Richard Leonard allegedly made the threat in front of his council colleagues, prompting the charge from the county prosecutor, NJ.com reports. Now, he is looking at jail time and fines. And he never got to accept an envelope of cash from a “developer.”
LAKEWOOD – Take a moment and read the next sentence carefully. Kids attending the Lakewood schools will now have to use clear book bags and walk through metal detectors, after the arrests of two Oak Street Elementary School students who brought a .22-caliber handgun to school. (Let that sink in for a moment.) Lakewood is now the first school district in Ocean County that will be sending six-year-old children through metal detectors with wands, the Asbury Park Press reports. It is certainly understandable as to why nervous school officials want to crack down. Yet it is stunning to see our society descend to such desperate levels to keep guns out of our schools.
BRICK – If we were the judges, the hands-down winner of the “Stuck at Prom” contest would be Nicholas Matawa. The graduating senior at Brick Memorial High School has concocted a full prom tux, hat and shoes out of 29 rolls of duct tape, in the hopes of scoring a $10,000 college scholarship, NJ 101.5reports. It took 34 hours to make this outfit, and Matawa has certainly earned the money from the Duck Tape company. Check out his official entry here.
HAMILTON TOWNSHIP – The message here: don’t be an ass. Local firefighters had no choice but to smash the windows and run a hose through a sedan that was blocking the fire hydrant early yesterday, as they worked to extinguish a house fire. The Hamilton Township Professional Firefighters are proud to post the photo on their Facebook page, showing how they had no choice but to thread the hose through the car, a clear message to the boob who owns it. They also had the fire quickly under control, no injuries except for this Acura.
IN OTHER IMPORTANT NEWS
RUSO, N.D. – Not only is he the oldest mayor in North Dakota, he’s has been re-elected with 100 percent of the vote. There is plenty of celebration in Ruso, where Mayor Bruce Lorenz has been able to capture all three votes in the state’s smallest incorporated city. The 86-year-old retired rural mail carrier can’t actually recall when he was first elected, maybe around 1988 or so, the Minot Daily News reports. He forgot that Tuesday was election day, until his daughter reminded him that it was time, yet again, to get out the vote. Lorenz – whose single issue calls for rural water service – is now in assisted living, telling voters, “My health went to pot this spring. I can’t even walk anymore without a walker.” No matter, the other two voters in town are cheering: “Four More Years!”
THIS DAY IN HISTORY
“Time to Go” was the message on this day in 1994, when the Giants unceremoniously cut their quarterback, Phil Simms, 38, saying his $2.325 million salary was too high and his right shoulder too fragile.
WORD OF THE DAY
Pugnacious – [pug-NAY-shəs] – adjective
Definition: Having a quarrelsome or combative nature
Example: Now, with a $5 bet on the line, I’m getting highly pugnacious watching the Mets.
WEATHER IN A WORD
Pretty
THE NEW 60
a Jaffe Briefing exclusive
by Andy Landorf & John Colquhoun
Editor’s Note: Jaffe Communications is the franchisee/publisher of TAPinto New Brunswick.