Welcoming the homeless to the ‘family’ | Faith Matters

Close communities of faith often describe their congregations as being “like a family.” 

Jersey City’s Congregation B’nai Jacob will put that idea to the test while hosting homeless families for the first time this week. 

Along with nine other houses of worship, all in Jersey City except St. Ann’s in Hoboken, B’nai Jacob is now part of Family Promise, an organization that operates in most counties of the state and invites houses of worship to host one or more families on site for a week or more.

The goal is keeping families together.    

There is a lot to prepare so Tiffany Kane, the volunteer executive director for Hudson County Family Promise, met with four of Jacob’s volunteers at the synagogue the Monday before the first three homeless families with six children would arrive. 

“Do not judge and give them dignity,” Kane said about why the family became homeless, noting that some fell behind on their rent or lost a job or got priced out by increasing rents in a more gentrified Jersey City. “Our mission is helping homeless families regain their independence.”

The families arrive today from Christ United Methodist in Jersey City, which hosted them last week. They had been screened by Garden State Episcopal at the Hudson Gardens, on Newark Avenue, before being accepted for the program. No one in the family can be under the influence or have a violent crime conviction.  All volunteers and family members are fingerprinted and undergo background checks.

B’nai Jacob’s large social hall would receive partitions and air mattresses with blankets and sheets from Family Promise. Dinner is provided followed by family time from 7 to 9 p.m. nightly when the guests watch TV, do homework and interact with the volunteers. 

All guests are free to come and go but have to be in by 9 at night. 

In the mornings, after breakfast, a Family Promise van transports those who go to work. Buses take the children to schools. The rest are brought to the Family Promise Day Center at Fountain of Salvation Church on Communipaw Avenue in Jersey City. They’ll remain there until they return to the B’Nai Jacob in the evening. 

Kane made clear to the volunteers that the parents are responsible for whatever they decide for their children. She also gave the volunteers a hotline number to call for emergencies. 

“Give them space,” she said. “And do not blabber about anything you observe.”

Most houses of worship do not have showers, but the guests can shower at the Day Center. Volunteers may not give the guests money and what they want to do for one, they have to do for all. They can invite the guests to any services or socials going on while they house them. 

“Never leave a child alone,” Kane said. 

Lockboxes are provided for medications. And, Family Promise partners with CarePoint Health for medical needs whether the guests have insurance or not.

Volunteer Amy Handelsman used to volunteer at a women’s shelter when she lived in Brooklyn Heights. 

“This is my giving back,” she said.

Rabbi Aaron Katz, who came to B’Nai Jacob about two years ago, said yes to this program even before he asked his board or sought volunteers, according to Jeff Schrimmer, a Jacob board member. 

“It needs to be done,” he recalled Katz saying. 

After Schrimmer left his family synagogue in Essex County, the Paulus Hook resident joined B’Nai Jacob last summer.  He calls Family Promise “a wonderful program.”

“I have a servant’s heart,” said Carol Boeckel, who is Christian but frequently attends B’nai Jacob.  “I watch people get confidence back and blossom and accomplish.”

That would apply to her friend, Glen Pertz. 

“I was homeless twice,” Pertz said. “I understand the plight and greater challenge for a family.” 

Volunteering is his, and their, family promise.

For information on Family Promise, go to FamilyPromiseHudson.org or call 201-448-1839.

EDITOR’S NOTE: The Rev. Alexander Santora is the pastor of Our Lady of Grace and St. Joseph, 400 Willow Ave., Hoboken, 07030, FAX: 201-659-5833; Email: padrealex@yahoo.com; Twitter: @padrehoboken.